ARTICLES:
Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?
and other Philosophical Observations

Stu Silverstein,MD

Doctors are an opinionated bunch...put 5 Doctors at a table and you will get 7 opinions on very topic. We also all fancy ourselves as philosophers, especially the surgeons among us ("I cut therefore I am") If the topic turns to managed care, those 7 opinions turn into 70. To help calm a recent heated "discussion" in our doctor’s lounge, I decided to inject some humor into the situation, to shift gears. I asked everyone to answer the proverbial question, " Why did the Chicken Cross the Road" from the perspective of their different specialties (the question was also posed to the Lawyers and the Managed Care administrator, in absentia). The following is a sampling of the results.

Pediatrician: To reassure the Mother Hen
Radiologist: Cannot say for sure that the Chicken actually crossed the Road, but I cannot rule out that he didn’t either. I would suggest that we order some more tests and perhaps consult with a Traffic cop to obtain additional clinical correlation.
Anesthesiologist: To get away from the Surgeons, banal and inappropriate banter and Joke telling.
Urologist: To Serve as RingSide Physician at the illegal CockFight.
Orthopedist: To replace the Rooster’s Hip.
Managed Care Director: It wasn’t really necessary for the Chicken to Cross the Road. He already had what he needed along with the necessary facilities on the side of the Road he was already standing on. Therefore he will have to pay out of pocket for the entire trip.
Endocrinologist: It actually wasn’t a Chicken. It was an Ostrich with Turner’s Syndrome, and the answer to the question may be easier to answer after a 24 hour, Avian Cortisol level.
Psychiatrist: Without a course of Antidepressants and a full year of individual psychotherapy, he wouldn’t even of had the motivation to cross the road in the first place.
Plastic Surgeon: To get a Breast implant and a thigh tuck.
Lawyer: Crossing the road is outside the limits of acceptable and standard practice in the Chicken community in particular and the fowl community in general, and I believe we have a case here. Here is my card.

Stu Silverstein, MD--in addition to being a Pediatrician--is also an award winning Standup comedian and Popular Keynote Speaker. His 2 presentations "Humor in Medicine ??? ... You Must be Joking!!!" and "Reducing Stress with Humor and Not the other way Around !!" keep him in high demand at conferences and meetings. For more information, call 203-406-4298 or visit www.mdhumor.com.   You can also request the Joke of the week by e-mail Joke@mdhumor.com.